Platinum Upgrade Raffle (October 2024)

BARRY:
- Hello!
VANESSA:
I didn't think you were coming.
:
No, I was just late.
I tried to call, but...
(Ken holds up his phone and flips it open. The phone has no charge)
...the battery...
VANESSA:

I didn't want all this to go to waste,
so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.
KEN:
Oh, that was lucky.
(Ken sits down at the table across from Barry and Vanessa leaves the room)
VANESSA:
There's a little left.
I could heat it up.
KEN:
(Not taking his eyes off Barry)
Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.
BARRY:
So I hear you're quite a tennis player.
:
I'm not much for the game myself.
The ball's a little grabby.
KEN:
That's where I usually sit.
Right...
(Points to where Barry is sitting)
there.
VANESSA:
(Calling from other room)
Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,
:
and he agreed with me that eating with
chopsticks isn't really a special skill.
KEN:
(To Barry)
You think I don't see what you're doing?
BARRY:
I know how hard it is to find
the right job. We have that in common.

KEN:
Do we?
BARRY:
Bees have 100 percent employment,
but we do jobs like taking the crud out.
KEN:
(Menacingly)
That's just what
I was thinking about doing.
(Ken reaches for a fork on the table but knocks if on the floor. He goes to
pick it up)
VANESSA:
Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor
for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.
(Ken quickly rises back up after hearing this but hits his head on the
table and yells)
BARRY:
I'm going to drain the old stinger.
KEN:
Yeah, you do that.
(Barry flies past Ken to get to the bathroom and Ken freaks out, splashing
some of the wine he was using to cool his head in his eyes. He yells in
anger)
(Barry looks at the magazines featuring his victories in court)
BARRY:
Look at that.
(Barry flies into the bathroom)
(He puts his hand on his head but this makes hurts him and makes him even
madder. He yells again)
(Barry is washing his hands in the sink but then Ken walks in)
KEN:
You know, you know I've just about had it
(Closes bathroom door behind him)
with your little mind games.
(Ken is menacingly rolling up a magazine)
BARRY:

(Backing away)
- What's that?
KEN:
- Italian Vogue.
BARRY:
Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.
KEN:
It's a lot of ads.
BARRY:
Remember what Van said, why is
your life more valuable than mine?
KEN:
That's funny, I just can't seem to recall that!
(Ken smashes everything off the sink with the magazine and Barry narrowly
escapes)
(Ken follows Barry around and tries to hit him with the magazine but he
keeps missing)
(Ken gets a spray bottle)
:
I think something stinks in here!
BARRY:
(Enjoying the spray)
I love the smell of flowers.
(Ken holds a lighter in front of the spray bottle)
KEN:
How do you like the smell of flames?!
BARRY:
Not as much.
(Ken fires his make-shift flamethrower but misses Barry, burning the
bathroom. He torches the whole room but looses his footing and falls into
the bathtub. After getting hit in the head by falling objects 3 times he
picks up the shower head, revealing a Water bug hiding under it)
WATER BUG:
Water bug! Not taking sides!

(Barry gets up out of a pile of bathroom supplies and he is wearing a
chapstick hat)
BARRY:
Ken, I'm wearing a Chapstick hat!
This is pathetic!
(Ken switches the shower head to lethal)
KEN:
I've got issues!
(Ken sprays Barry with the shower head and he crash lands into the toilet)
(Ken menacingly looks down into the toilet at Barry)
Well, well, well, a royal flush!
BARRY:
- You're bluffing.
KEN:
- Am I?
(flushes toilet)
(Barry grabs a chapstick from the toilet seat and uses it to surf in the
flushing toilet)
BARRY:
Surf's up, dude!
(Barry flies out of the toilet on the chapstick and sprays Ken's face with
the toilet water)
:
EW,Poo water!
BARRY:
That bowl is gnarly.
KEN:
(Aiming a toilet cleaner at Barry)
Except for those dirty yellow rings!
(Barry cowers and covers his head and Vanessa runs in and takes the toilet
cleaner from Ken just before he hits Barry)
VANESSA:
Kenneth! What are you doing?!
KEN==
(Leaning towards Barry)

You know, I don't even like honey!
I don't eat it!
VANESSA:
We need to talk!
(Vanessa pulls Ken out of the bathroom)
:
He's just a little bee!
:
And he happens to be
the nicest bee I've met in a long time!
KEN:
Long time? What are you talking about?!
Are there other bugs in your life?
VANESSA:
No, but there are other things bugging
me in life. And you're one of them!
KEN:
Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...
:
My nerves are fried from riding
on this emotional roller coaster!
VANESSA:
Goodbye, Ken.
(Ken huffs and walks out and slams the door. But suddenly he walks back in
and stares at Barry)
:
And for your information,
I prefer sugar-free, artificial
sweeteners MADE BY MAN!
(Ken leaves again and Vanessa leans in towards Barry)
VANESSA:
I'm sorry about all that.
(Ken walks back in again)

KEN:
I know it's got
an aftertaste! I LIKE IT!
(Ken leaves for the last time)
VANESSA:
I always felt there was some kind
of barrier between Ken and me.
:
I couldn't overcome it.
Oh, well.
:
Are you OK for the trial?
BARRY:
I believe Mr. Montgomery
is about out of ideas.
(Flash forward in time and Barry, Adam, and Vanessa are back in court)
MONTGOMERY--
We would like to call
Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.
ADAM:
Good idea! You can really see why he's
considered one of the best lawyers...
(Barry stares at Adam)
...Yeah.
LAWYER:
Layton, you've
gotta weave some magic
with this jury,
or it's gonna be all over.
MONTGOMERY:
Don't worry. The only thing I have
to do to turn this jury around
:
is to remind them
of what they don't like about bees.
(To lawyer)

- You got the tweezers?
LAWYER:
- Are you allergic?
MONTGOMERY:
Only to losing, son. Only to losing.
:
Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you
what I think we'd all like to know.
:
What exactly is your relationship
(Points to Vanessa)
:
to that woman?
BARRY:
We're friends.
MONTGOMERY:
- Good friends?
BARRY:
- Yes.
MONTGOMERY:
How good? Do you live together?
ADAM:
Wait a minute...
:
MONTGOMERY:
Are you her little...
:
...bedbug?
(Adam's stinger starts vibrating. He is agitated)
I've seen a bee documentary or two.
From what I understand,

:
doesn't your queen give birth
to all the bee children?
BARRY:
- Yeah, but...
MONTGOMERY:
(Pointing at Janet and Martin)
- So those aren't your real parents!
JANET:
- Oh, Barry...
BARRY:
- Yes, they are!
ADAM:
Hold me back!
(Vanessa tries to hold Adam back. He wants to sting Montgomery)
MONTGOMERY:
You're an illegitimate bee,
aren't you, Benson?
ADAM:
He's denouncing bees!
MONTGOMERY:
Don't y'all date your cousins?
(Montgomery leans over on the jury stand and stares at Adam)
VANESSA:
- Objection!
(Vanessa raises her hand to object but Adam gets free. He flies straight at
Montgomery)
=ADAM:
- I'm going to pincushion this guy!